Saturday, April 15, 2006

the long and winding (or should that be winded) road

I'm a redhead down to the core of my soul (where-ever that may be) but nature has to be reminded of that fact every four to six weeks. That means i have a temper that flares easily, quickly, and everyone will immediately hear what i have to think--but it will go away just as quickly; and i can't hold a grudge no matter how hard i try.
When i was in junior high i wanted to be a poet (tho I was sure i would die a poetic death by seventeen at the latest). In high school being an architect didn't sound too bad so i took three years of physics, calculus, etc; then my first year of college i continued with the sciences and a pre-med major. My second year of college i took a quite a turn and decided to switch to the theatre department (flashback to that six-year-old-kicking-and-screaming temper tantrum that prompted my mother to tell me that i should be an actress when i grew up--did she ever grow to regret that).
A few years into acting and a few consultations with my advisers in which i was told (among other things–which were more true, and therefore less entertaining) that i was not devoted enough to my art because i was too busy working (to pay the very bills to keep me in school...such is life) i had a brief (perhaps two to three quarters--an antiquated university system since done away with on most campuses) flirtation with psychology {and obviously a never-ending love affair/obsession with parentheses} (a field i swore never to go into because it was my mother’s field). Interesting side note: when you tell people you’re a theatre major all you usually hear from them is "interesting" in that rather odd tone and the conversation either mercifully ends or goes on to another subject from there; when you tell people you’re a psychology major you are suddenly hearing all of their problems/life stories. I went running back to the theatre department, tail between my legs. I finally did graduate with a B.A. in general theatre with a minor in creative writing (that poetry/author bug was still lurking somewhere) and i was quite happy with the education i ended up with. I’ve often said that my degree in theatre gave me a great liberal education because learning the history and culture of people trying to express themselves dramatically is learning the history of the world (because that is what they are expressing after all). The added benefit is that no-one graduating with a B.A. in theatre can realistically be expecting anyone to hand them a job (all sorts of other recent grads unrealistically expect that only to be disillusioned–no disillusionment in store for me!)
Three years in the world of the same kind of work i’d already been doing for years plus a year of free vocational school for office skills (fill in a few forms and some wonderful community college counselor finds funding for "an overeducated/underemployed woman" never found out Where that funding came from–about the only unknown source of funding i’ve ever (not) found) a longing to be back in the hallowed halls sent me in search of graduate schools (and majors). Though i longed i knew with absolute certainty that i did Not want to teach (especially not junior high–did not like that age when i WAS that age). I loved research and i loved learning, this bookworm suddenly realized that i needed to be a librarian and that i should have realized it long ago. And the best thing was that Library Science was only a graduate level subject so tho i was late in realizing my vocation i had not wasted the life leading up to it–not that a life can ever be wasted if you enjoy it and use/learn what you get from it–we are always the sum of everything that we have been.
When i was in Library School i wanted to be an academic librarian (again the lure of those hallowed halls and ivory towers) i remember class introductions and so many members would say "I want to be a reference librarian" and inwardly groaning, "oh god i SO DO NOT want to be a public reference librarian–ten years of customer service, food service, retail, etc, is quite enough Thank You! (Not really a big people person here)". i’m a public service librarian (read reference librarian in a public library). Have been for about eight years, most of the time i like my job–it definitely could be worse. Oh yeah, did i mention that the library is right next to a junior high school? Did i mention how much i love junior-high-schoolers? Sometimes i have to go on a little rampage...or two...or a big rampage...

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