This Morning I Pray for My Enemies ~Joy Harjo

And whom do I call my enemy?
An enemy must be worthy of engagement.
I turn in the direction of the sun and keep walking.
It’s the heart that asks the question, not my furious mind.
The heart is the smaller cousin of the sun.
It sees and knows everything.
It hears the gnashing even as it hears the blessing.
The door to the mind should only open from the heart.
An enemy who gets in, risks the danger of becoming a friend.

this is where you find yourself

i guess it comes to this

sometimes

(tho’ what this is, i couldn’t quite say)

714 unpublished blog posts (to  407 published—and the last published post was ONE in the 2016 TWO in 2015 and so on, and so on, and so on)

so much for writing

can’t say i’ve done much other writing either

at least half my life is over

and i’m not entirely happy with  the turn of things

so every night i vow to wake up and try

and sometimes i do

a little

and mostly 

i don't

and then i find myself in the same place all over again

You Lose Something Every Day ~Willie Perdomo

While I Slept ~Navtej Bharati

Why Is There Confetti In So Many Taser Guns?

one of the advantages of walking daily (besides the whole getting healthier, losing weight, blah, blah blah is having the  to listen to more podcasts—something i lost when i stopped longer commutes (which i don't miss, by the by)

anyway, today learned that many tasers have confetti which contain trackers in it

from Mental Floss UK:

When a Taser gun is deployed, two probes are fired up to 10.6 metres, attaching to the body through up to 5cm of clothing and creating an electrical circuit between the gun and the victim’s muscles and nerves.
Normal gun manufacturers use various techniques to make every barrel unique. When a bullet passes through the barrel, it produces individual markings and these can be used to analyse whether the bullet was fired from a particular gun.
But, unlike regular gun bullets, the Taser probes are not able to leave an identifying mark that would lead investigators back to the person that fired them.
So in 1993 the AFID system was created. Now, when many Taser guns are fired, they disperse dozens of colourful anti-felon identification (AFID) tags, which resemble confetti and are printed with tiny serial numbers. It would be very time-consuming to pick all the tags up and so inevitably the police are able to find some and trace the gun that was used.
Huge swathes of law enforcement officers also carry this variety of Taser, which helps in determining overall accountability when the gun is used in the line of duty, although it’s mainly used to trace personal Taser use.
"What it is doing is preventing people from doing crimes," says Taser Vice President Steve Tuttle. "It tells the owner, if you do, you're putting twenty to thirty [business cards] out there."
"There's a ninety-eight per cent chance that when you deploy this, good luck, because we're going to catch you."

I also highly recommend listening A Violin’s Life by Frank Almond at the moth

Horses ~Witter Bynner - 1881-1968

i've always had mixed feelings about trying to interpret another's words

but i know from my own writing workshops that other people often find things in my own words that i didn't know were there until they brought them out, and when they point them out i realize they were there all along. We all colour things with our own thoughts and experiences (and that's why movies NEVER live up to books, but can be great on their own) but once you put a creative work out into the world it no longer belongs to you alone (though your interpretation has more meaning than others', theirs has some validity as well--it might also have something to do with why, although i still want to write, i don't really want to publish, ironic though it may be, i'm stating it here...

time may change me

but i can’t trace time.

earlier it was:

Just can't today
All I want to do is listen to Bowie and


stare into the darkness, obliteration, and cruelty of time.

now it’s just:

“Planet Earth is blue.

And there's nothing I can do.”

 

(one thing he did)

of gun control knives and what caring means

and don’t come back any other day

I missed you before you were even gone

 

Dad,

the view from atop your shoulders was always the greatest

you told the best stories

sang the best songs

and made me feel safe as you rocked me to sleep

i'll miss you

(i think i started before you were even gone)

"My dad died"

"My dad is dead"

the words almost roll

but they halt

i lost myself

i lost myself

somewhere

years ago

maybe along the way
maybe on a tangent or detour

but i didn’t notice the missing

and now
it seems

it’s too late

to become anyone at all

this gif is my new mood elevator

and i find i’m resorting to its charms on a rather regular basis of late

consider it a gif  

t

you’re welcome…

so there i was, just be bopping along, when suddenly

 

not only have i somehow become middle-aged

(what the hell happened there?),

but my blog has lingered, unwritten, for over a year (and it was quite spotty before that.)

 

   so this is my life now…

for what it's worth...

Source: Staples eReader Department

and what is it worth, anyway?

I can’t decide if this is really

cool or really absurd.

 

still undecided~but, perhaps inexplicably, i think I want it!

canines for a feline free tomorrow

first there was this:


then this:


predicted by Violent Femmes?

whatever happened to this Buffy voiceover intro?

	1845 Boston shipyards were plagued by a series of grisly murders. The attacks ended when a quiet young woman arrived in town.
	1866: Virginia. The frequent and unexplained disappearance of local Civil War widows shocked an already grieving community. These disturbing events ended when Lucy Hanover set up camp in a nearby graveyard.
	1893: Oklahoma Territory. A series of savage attacks claimed the lives of seventeen homesteaders. The murders stopped when a young blacksmith passed through town.
	1897: Virginia City, Wyoming. A string of bizarre murders shocked this small hillside community. The killings ceased shortly after 20 year old Florence Gilbert arrived in town.
	1912: 23 New Yorkers lost their lives in the 1912 Brooklyn Boarding House Murders. The killings ended abruptly when a student nurse named Arabella Gish sought lodgings in room number 6.
	1927: Chicago. Over a period of two weeks 41 bodies were found near Union Station. Shortly after the arrival of a young woman, the mysterious murders stopped.

As long as there have been demons, there has been the Slayer. One girl in all the world, a Chosen one, born with the strength and skill to hunt vampires and other deadly creatures, to find them where they gather and to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their numbers.

it opened the show the first season and then disappeared, never to be seen again, not on the vhs releases, not in any of the DVDs, nowhere (believe me, i know…)

Or was it just me?

damn kids…

not only does this kitten act like a baby Katushka

she looks like one too:

i see vampires

so All My Children was never one of my addictions (that honour belonged, very briefly, to General Hospital because i was hard in teenage lust with Thaao Penghlis, then his character came to justice or died or something and i lost interest in General Hospital then, when i was fifteen, one Christmas vacation, i stumbled upon his face on some other show and thus began my thirty-year secret devotion to Days of Our Lives~when you’ve watched something for that many years it just seems inappropriate to give it up, but that is far beyond the point…)

I have other, well-known-and-no-need-to-mention reasons to be pleased by this:

 

Sarah Michelle Gellar returns to 'All My Children,' makes us pine for soaps' good ol' days

 

Sarah Michelle Gellar made her triumphant return to daytime TV today (just one week after making her triumphant return to all of TV in Ringer!), appearing in one episode of her old stomping ground, All My Children, which goes off the air for good Friday. (Sob.)

Despite saying she would be playing a whole new character, Gellar appeared as a hospital patient with amnesia who can’t remember anything about herself — except that she is Erica Kane’s (Susan Lucci) daughter, the role she originated nearly 20 years ago. One highlight? While chatting with the nurse, Gellar describes her unique condition and alludes to her future star-making role in a tongue-in-cheek way:

Gellar: “So I see vampires, that doesn’t make me crazy!”
Nurse: “No, vampires are very popular…”
Gellar: “I saw them before they were trendy!”

Gellar, who won a daytime Emmy for her work on AMC, was only in two brief scenes, but it’s nice to see her back on daytime — it helps us remember the good ol’ days when she played Kendall Hart, personal assistant and long-lost daughter to Erica, in the ’90s. Still, we forgive her for moving on to play a kick-ass heroine in a show about vampires… yes, before they were trendy.