Sunday, May 07, 2006

in the waning hours (before the end)

Do i want you to be my daddy?
And if so when will you leave me?
What are the stories you will tell me before you go?
Is it the stories i receive comfort from?
The times you rock me in you arms,
back and forth across the floor,
stories about old shep –i think he’s dying–think he’s leaving in the end
stories about monk-the-monk (that’s me) monk the monk- doesn’t he fall to his knees in the end–no support
but old shep–there was always old shep whatever it was about old shep did he get shot did he go out to pasture i have no memory of ol shep he was just a good ol boy who went the god ol way and i don’t know anything but i was beginning to know something i was beginning to hear things i tried not to hear i just wanted to go to hawaii and we went to hawaii and it was christmas and everything was cool in hawaii and i found a friend and we tried to hide in the ocean but the ocean tumbles and tosses us a bit more than is comfortable for me it is my cradle and my grave–always has been love the sea–the salt–the blood–the life–the time–the tide WHAT DOES THAT TIKI REPRESENT my parents went to hawaii to celebrate their divorce HAHAHA where am i now?
playing games with scent fire pain death alcohol drugs
where does it end
who am i

who are you?
Strange stories on gender
who are we
still trying to thread the wick through the candle
honk honk beep beep
i don’t want to be 39
don’t feel 29
what is age
is there anyone alive who can tell me who i am.????
...i need your love

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