Friday, July 14, 2006

just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you...

is it possible to work anywhere and not have to play little games of workplace politics?
To not get involved in revolving soap operas?
To have a job where you just go to work, do whatever tasks you're supposed to do, go home, leaving all work tasks and thoughts at work, live a separate life at home, return the next day and repeat?
Does anyone hop out of bed in the morning eager to go to work, enjoy their entire day there and go to sleep at night excited to do it all over again the next day?
okay now that is beginning to sound a bit would be nice to not have to drag yourself to work--to have to talk yourself into to going day after day.
Do i sound like i'm new to the world of work (i'm not--i'm gagging on the decades of experience i've had--the number of Different jobs and experience--just had to redo my resume for that promotion interview--which i didn't get by the by--that's an oh well i always say maybe next time...) not even new to this library--eight years here--sometimes i just choke on the routine--on the sameness--on the fact that sometimes i just cannot stand my job and yet there's not another one i want--I Want to Be a Librarian--and there are So Very Many Jobs that could be so much worse than this one (i know i've had at least a few of them)
Can you trust the people around you to do and say what they say they are going to do and say?
In case you haven't guessed things are not all hippy happy in library land--they have been a little more than tense--tripping over rumours here--waiting for things to change that you know won't there--a few seeming backroom machinations, hushed water cooler conversations--you know the drill...
And the time of year we all await with eager anticipation. Everything goes fine except for a little added advice from my go off on a few little Rampages and somehow it just doesn't seem Marionly librianly or something, geesh...
But still my evaluation is just the same as always (basically fine) then i get back from vacation and somehow little caveats have been attached to my signed evaluation form without my knowledge--raising my red-headed rampaging taurean ire--feeling the already high library tension level begin to rise--that's another oh well
i just join my co-workers in their efforts to cope. Paste that big smile on over my clenched teeth.
And to top it all i've just been rejected by my space: "We’re sorry. Based on the information you have submitted to us, you are ineligible to register on" okay i read through their terms of service (yup, ALL of them, and i couldn't find anything in them that would make me ineligible) now you may be wondering why i would be joining to begin with, i am beginning to wonder that myself at this point, after having spent so much time entering different email addresses, password permutations, rebooting my computer, clearing my cache, etc., etc., etc., just to retry resigning up for the damn MySpace, that i no longer remember whatever trivial reason i felt a need to have an account for the (mainly) teenbooper site--even so i feel rejected by a club i never wanted to join in the first place (sort of a reverse Groucho Marx syndrome)
How do you just keep on keeping on?
and so it goes...
what is it that Scarlet O'hara said
"Tomorrow is another day?"

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